Dating as Shadow Work: Turning Emotional Triggers into Pathways of Growth

with Marie Thouin PhD

a live and recorded online class from Wicked Grounds

2/19 6pm Pacific

Dating has a way of bringing our shadow to the surface — fast. Few other arenas of modern life expose our tender spots quite like romance does. One moment, we feel exhilarated; the next, we’re swimming in shame, rejection, insecurity, or hopelessness. In this class, we’ll explore dating as a spiritual and psychological practice — a living laboratory for shadow integration.

Through guided reflection, dialogue, and practical tools, we’ll look at the emotions we most want to avoid — abandonment, disappointment, shame, embarrassment, insecurity, grandiosity — and learn how to work with them skillfully. Rather than chasing validation or avoiding pain, we’ll reframe dating as a path of self-inquiry and expansion. Every experience, even the “bad dates,” becomes material for growth, self-reclamation, and emotional liberation.

By shifting from a win/lose mindset to one of curiosity and evolution, participants will learn how to date from wholeness — not from the shadow’s need to be seen, saved, or soothed.

You’ll learn how to:

1. Recognize and name the shadow emotions that surface in dating
2. Identify projection, fantasy, and defense patterns in romantic dynamics
3. Transform emotional triggers into insights for integration and healing
4. Reclaim your psycho-emotional space from rejection loops and idealization
5. Approach dating as a sacred practice of awareness, embodiment, and authenticity

Format:

Interactive talk + guided reflection exercises + group dialogue

Who it’s for:

This class is for anyone who senses that dating can be more than just a search for “the one” — and that it can be a profound mirror and teacher.

It’s especially for:

1. Intellectually and spiritually curious humans who love psychological depth and meaning-making
2. Relationship geeks and emotional explorers who want to understand their own patterns more deeply
3. Queer, non-monogamous, kinky, or otherwise non-traditional daters seeking a growth-oriented framework that honors their complexity
4. Free spirits who want to love and connect authentically, without giving away their power
5. Anyone tired of repetitive loops who’s ready to use dating as a site of awakening rather than reenactment

No matter your gender, orientation, or relational style, this space invites honesty, courage, and curiosity about what dating stirs within you — and how every emotional trigger can become a doorway to greater freedom.

PRESENTER:

Marie Thouin, PhD is the author of "What is Compersion? Understanding Positive Empathy in Consensually Non-Monogamous Relationships," the first-ever comprehensive scholarly book on compersion. She has been featured in several publications and podcasts, including ELLE, the Savage Lovecast, The Times of London, and HuffPost. Marie has also published seminal research studies, the first encyclopedia entry on compersion, and is the creator of www.WhatIsCompersion.com, a popular website that features her research, blogs, and resources on the topic of compersion. She is the Founder of Love InSight, a Mindful Dating & Relationship Coaching practice where she supports and guides people of all backgrounds and relational orientations to create intentional and vibrant love lives.

ACCESS:

This will be a live, recorded online class offered through Zoom. To participate, you may need to download the free, basic version of the Zoom app before the class! This class will be recorded and distributed to those who registered.

Zoom now provides closed captioning, which will be available for this event.