EMBRACE INTENSITY: Emotional Sadomasochism in BDSM with Ember Solaris!

Take a deep dive into the intense realm of emotional sadomasochism.

When: Saturday, September 13th, 2025 11:00 AM - 1:00 PM, Pacific Time

Where: Online, Zoom

Ticket link: https://forbiddentickets.com/events/black-thorn/584a4310d8

Fetlife RSVP: https://fetlife.com/events/1848532

Please Note: This class will be recorded and the recording will be available to ticket holders.

At their core, emotions are sensory data. They're complex, embodied responses that provide feedback about things like our internal states, relational environments, and social positioning. They signal threat and safety, create meaning, reinforce memory, and mediate connection. Emotional experiences aren't mere reactions, but instead sources of knowledge, interpretation, and direction. They tell us what matters.

Emotional S&M through Ember's eyes is the strategic use of emotion to create anything from a recreational or cathartic practice, to an erotic or transformative one. Emotional sadomasochism involves intentionally engaging with affective states such as shame, longing, fear, panic, humiliation, guilt, or emotional surrender, not to pathologize or “fix” them, but to play with them: to explore their intensity, evoke reactions, navigate vulnerability, and reclaim agency through role, ritual, and power.

This class, grounded in emotion theory, explores the psychological mechanics, ethical dilemmas, and relational opportunities of emotional sadomasochism.

What You’ll Learn:

What Are Emotions, Really?

Drawing from affect theory, neuroscience, and constructivist models, we explore how emotional states are formed, shared, interpreted, and leveraged for erotic or interpersonal ends.

Why We Play With Emotional Pain

From horror films to heartbreak songs, humans seek out emotional intensity recreationally. This section examines how kink functions as a controlled arena for navigating emotional extremity and symbolic transgression that offers anything from arousal to catharsis, intimacy, and sometimes healing.

Fantasy and Symbolic Weight

Emotional S/M scenes often revolve around symbolically dense narratives: punishment, abandonment, humiliation, religious transgression, approval-seeking, or failure. We’ll analyze the function of fantasy in scripting scenes and the risks and rewards of engaging with deeply held internal scripts.

Negotiating Emotional Terrain

Emotional sadomasochism lives and dies by meaning. We’ll introduce a framework for narrative alignment, helping players negotiate shared emotional arcs, clarify intention, and help prevent post-scene dissonance between partners with mismatched expectations or symbolic interpretations.

Risk Profiling and Harm Reduction

Not all pain is desired. We’ll map emotional risk profiles, explore how to distinguish between risk, rupture, and reenactment, and discuss tools for pre-scene communication, consent calibration, and psychological grounding.

Aftercare and Emotional Integration

Aftercare for emotional S/M requires more than a blanket and water. We’ll explore techniques for emotional containment, witnessing, narrative closure, and relational re-regulation after scenes that leave participants exposed, elated, devastated, or transformed.

The Ethics of Emotional Power

What is the difference between emotional sadism and emotional abuse? Between empowering surrender and exploitative catharsis? Because it's more than just slapping the label of consent on the practice. This section invites reflection on power literacy, ethical leadership, and the responsibility we hold in wielding emotional influence in kink.

Who This Is For

This workshop is designed for experienced kink practitioners, D/s relationship explorers, edge players, mental health professionals in kink-aware contexts, and educators who seek a deeper understanding of emotional complexity in power-based play. Come prepared to think critically, reflect deeply, and expand your vocabulary for one of kink’s most potent and understudied playgrounds.

About Ember Solaris

Ember Solaris (@xSolaris) is a Sadistic D-type leaning switch and social scientist who infuses her passion for research into every class she presents. Drawing from extensive training in emotions, trauma, addictive behaviors, and relationship dynamics, Ember bridges evidence-based practice with her primal identity—fueled by an arcane fascination with blood, ritual, and transformative intensity. Whether demonstrating intricate sharps techniques, discussing neurobiology, or exploring the role of primal headspaces and erotic justice, Ember’s sessions combine depth, passion, ferocity, and ethical complexity. She collaborates with attendees to foster inclusive, intersectional learning environments, weaving curiosity and empathy into hands-on, immersive experiences. Ember carves spaces where participants can unearth their most authentic selves. A companion for those seeking both intellectual rigor and carnal exploration, Ember thrives in exploring new frontiers in kink and beyond. A queer, genderqueer nerd, Ember lives in the gray spaces and hopes to meet you there.