Bonobo Network Presents Kiss and Tell: A Sexy Second Bass Party

🗓️ Date: Saturday, May 10th 2025 7pm-3am

📍 Location: address will be released to ticket holders, Oakland, CA

SAVE THE DATE! TICKET LAUNCH THURSDAY April 17th at 7pm

Eventbrite: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bonobo-network-presents-kiss-and-tell-a-sexy-second-bass-party-tickets-1326182259839?aff=oddtdtcreator

Agenda

7:00 PM - 9:15 PM Doors open

NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.

7:30 PM - 8:30 PM Pre-party Playshop TBA

9:15 PM - 10:00 PM Opening Circle

[NOTE: No entry after opening circle without permission from hosts. Email info@bonobonetwork.com if you think you may need to join late.]

2:00 AM - 2:30 AM Closing Circle

Closing Circle is a time for us to share our experience, ecstatic or hard, to be seen, known, and normalize that these events are a full spectrum experience for everyone.

About this event

They say that dance is the vertical expression of horizontal desires. Guess we'll find out just how true that is.

At Kiss and Tell, your expressions of desire may need to stay clothed – barely – but they don't have to stay vertical. Take a break from dancing on our 1500 sq. foot dance floor to sensuously snuggle with lovers old and new.

The night’s music will feature an incredible lineup of DJs. Plus a fun playshop to open the night is certain to warm you up for the night’s activities.

Unlike our full play parties, this event is open to non-Bonobo members. With lower stakes and a more relaxed vibe, it's a perfect way to introduce Bonobo-curious friends, or those feeling a little nervous about play parties, to our community.

Just remember that the party has "second base" limits on connection, which means you’ll need to keep your panties on. We'll get you all worked up with a bevy of sensual explorations but you'll have to take the party home to go any further.

To make sure everyone feels safe enough to play at their edges, we don't allow any physical touch without clear consent. If you can't play by the rules, you may be asked to leave the party -- and that's no fun!

This is an alcohol-free event. We encourage you to limit intoxication so you can stay tuned in to the needs, boundaries, and desires of your fellow guests.

Make sure you're up on Bonobo party etiquette by watching this video: https://youtu.be/eCtnU0SCdSA?si=xAHd7u-oKLG0HSdm

Learn more about our consent framework at https://bonobonetwork.com/consent

If you are not yet a Bonobo Network member but you’re interested in joining you can learn more about us at https://bonobonetwork.com and apply for membership at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply. By joining you'll get access to all of our play parties and members only community events.

Please be sure to read ALL details below.

Your Eventbrite FINAL DETAILS email will contain ALL relevant details for attending this event TO ARRIVE THE DAY BEFORE THE EVENT. Check your email - including your spam folder - for a message from noreply@eventbrite.com. Please read this email in full and instruct any guests for whom you may have purchased tickets to do the same!

»»» Playshop TBA

We’re still putting the final touches on this event’s playshop. Whether it’s a sensual icebreaker, a guided experience, or a spark to ignite your curiosity, it’s designed to help you drop in, warm up, and get inspired for the night ahead.

Stay tuned—details coming soon

»»» MUSIC

We’re curating the perfect soundtrack for the night—expect a lineup that will keep your body moving, your energy high, and the vibes just right.

Stay tuned for the full lineup—trust us, you’ll want to be on the dance floor for this one. 🎶🔥

»»» Connect on Plura (FKA Bloom)

Want to see who's going, match, chat, and meet the community? https://heyplura.com/events/bonobo-kissandtell-051025

»»» Foreplay - Pre-party meetup

Foreplay is a fantastic way to get to know each other with our clothes on and in a low-pressure environment. You're welcome to bring friends and lovers who've never been to a Bonobo event but who may be interested! https://plra.io/m/kissandtell-foreplay-050725

»»» Venue Accessibility

Although our party venue consists of multiple levels connected by stairs, all levels are wheelchair accessible via a lift. There is a wheelchair accessible bathroom on the first floor. We are committed to making accommodations wherever possible. If you have specific accessibility needs or require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact us in advance, and we will do our utmost to assist you.

»»» Volunteering

Volunteering is a great way to meet other Bonobos, and volunteer tickets have discounts baked into them as a thank you for your contribution. Available roles include:

Pre-Party

1. Setup (Saturday 5pm - 7pm Pre-party) [$35 ticket]

During Party

1. Food Support (60 minutes at the beginning of the party) [$35 ticket]
2. Greeting (90 minute shifts before and during party) [$45 ticket]
3. Covid Testing Support ( 90 minute shifts before and during party) [$45 ticket]
4. Angel Crew (60 minute shifts during party) [$45 ticket]
5. Cleaning (60 minute shifts during party) [$45 ticket]

Post-Party

1. Strike (Sunday 11am - 1pm Post-Party) [$25 ticket]

»»» Inviting your Friends

Want to invite a friend to this or future parties? Great! Bonobo Network membership is NOT required to attend Kiss And Tell. If they'd like to become a Bonobo member, you can invite them to learn more about us and apply at https://bonobonetwork.com/apply.

1. Your friends should FULLY understand Bonobo Network's culture, especially around consent.
2. They should be broadly familiar with their boundaries and be able to set boundaries with others.
3. They should be able to resolve conflicts gracefully, generously, and empathetically.
4. They're someone you trust to be accountable to you and to this community.
5. Ideally, you trust them implicitly, and you would either play with them yourself or recommend that your friends play with them at the party.
6. You would feel comfortable staking your reputation on their being a good fit for our community. (NOTE: This is different from feeling confident that they would enjoy themselves or get something out of the experience.)

»»» Registration + Tickets

Tickets for our standard members will be on a sliding scale starting at $65.

Tickets will be on a sliding scale starting at $55 for PrimeMates, our premium members. [PRIMEMATE MEMBERS: You have a special code that you received when you became a member. Use that for your discount.]

IMPORTANT!

If you're purchasing more than one ticket, please make sure each individual attending is named!

Our Ticketing Pricing Policy - Updated 7.24.24

***NOTAFLOF Tickets - Action Required (see below)

As we continue to grow and create memorable experiences together, we want to share some important updates regarding the way we manage tickets for our events. Thank you for your feedback about access to tickets and creating ease around ticket transfers. We hope these changes provide a lot better user experience. We are also providing clearer guidelines about use of NOTOFLOF codes and a new request system for those who use those codes.

Supporting Our Community: No One Turned Away for Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) Changes

NOTAFLOF Codes by Request Only

We will be changing the NOTAFLOF codes for each party. Please use this Form before the event to request a NOTAFLOF discount code. You can then apply this code on the day of the ticket drop.

Request a NOTAFLOF discount code here

We are committed to inclusivity and accessibility. Our sliding scale ticket pricing remains in place to support those with financial hardship while allowing those with greater means to contribute more. This helps us uphold our No One Turned Away For Lack Of Funds (NOTAFLOF) policy. We would like to offer some examples of what code to use based on need.

25% Off: For those with moderate financial needs. Examples might include:

1. Individuals supporting a dependent.
2. Those with some medical expenses not covered by insurance.
3. Individuals who have periodic financial difficulties but can generally manage their expenses.

50% Off: For those with significant financial constraints. Examples might include:

1. Individuals with significant debt or loans.
2. Those who receive public assistance or unemployment benefits.
3. People with substantial immigration-related expenses.

75% Off: For those with severe financial hardship. Examples might include:

1. Single parents or guardians with no additional financial support.
2. Those with limited income or support.
3. Individuals with large, ongoing medical expenses or disabilities.
4. Unpaid community organizers with no disposable income.

Waitlists:

We are experimenting with a prototype waitlist system. Before requesting a refund, please check the waitlist to see if someone else can take your spot.

While we are working on a better system, we will use a spreadsheet for the waitlist. You can find the link to the waitlist spreadsheet in the Eventbrite event description.

We also want to extend our gratitude to the community members who have been managing this on their own for the last few parties. Your efforts have been invaluable, and we are thrilled to implement a more formal process on our end. We’re also grateful to the handful of community members that are currently volunteering their time to help us design a better waitlist!

Please use the waitlist spreadsheet to sell your ticket, including volunteer tickets. Our Volunteer No Show Policy is now in effect for all parties

Ticket transfers: You can update the info on eventbrite yourself or email info@bonobonetwork.com with the new ticket holder first and last name, email address and phone number. If transferring after final details email and volunteer emails have come out, please forward these communications

Refund Policy:

1. We are still working on the details of our official refund policy, including the specifics of our Covid refund policy. Stay tuned for more updates soon.

Thank you for being a part of our community and for your understanding as we experiment and implement these changes.

»»» Covid Policy

We no longer require proof of vaccination.

Your COVID testing options are:

1. Present a timestamped photo of a covid rapid antigen test taken the day of the event at the door.
2. Present the results of a PCR test administered within 48 hours of the party.
3. Bring your own COVID test to take on site. If you use this option, please wear a mask into the venue. There will be a limited supply of rapid tests available for purchase - PLEASE BRING YOUR OWN.

If you need to take a covid test onsite, you must wear a mask.

»»» Incident Reporting

If your boundaries are crossed at the party, if a Bonobo member acts in ways that are not in accordance with our culture and values, or even if someone just kinda creeps you out, please report the incident to an angel or party host. We also encourage you to file an incident report online at http://bit.ly/bonoboincidentreport.

Incident reports aren't just for consent violations at Bonobo events. If people are behaving in the ways described above outside of parties, it can be helpful for organizers to know.

»»» Bonobo Network Principles

What began as a series of small parties in Summer 2010 has grown into a community that has served 3,000 people around the Bay Area and the world. Our community is united by the following principles, which inform how we orient towards the spaces we share and how we treat one another:

High Possibility, Low Expectation: Our communities are best when they're treated as high possibility, low expectation spaces. That means two things: first, that all kinds of awesome sexy interactions are possible, but that no one should be expected to interact with you in any particular way. No one owes you anything. Second, we often attend these events with an expectation of the type or quality of experience we should have. While anything is possible, you'll probably have a much better experience if you lose those expectations of yourself and open yourself up to the abundance of connection of all kinds available to you at the party. Low expectation DOES NOT mean "low desire" – we believe it's helpful to have a well-explored and articulated sense of what you want and to hold those desires lightly.

Trust and Integrity: Parties like ours are built on trust – that's what allows us to be as open and welcoming and vulnerable as we can be inside those spaces. But this requires that we all show up in full integrity, pledging to be our most trustworthy. Three important implications of this : keep the identities of folks at our events confidential, proactively disclose relevant safer sex risks, and take exquisite care of the venues, spaces, and neighborhood ecosystems that host us.

Consent: We agree that we will only physically engage with one another, including nonsexual touch, where there is CLEAR CONSENT. We define consent as an ongoing collaboration between two or more people in constant verbal, physical, and emotional dialogue about what each other needs to safely, willingly, and pleasurably interact with one another. Gold standard consent in Bonobo Network is affirmative, informed, unpressured, specific, competently given, and ongoing. Respecting and valuing consent isn't just about preventing violations that shred trust -- it's also about making sure that everyone has as much space as they need to fully occupy their yes. Please read our Consent and Accountability Policy (https://bit.ly/bonoboconsentpolicy) for more details on how we approach consent and accountability.

High Challenge, High Support: Play parties can be challenging and emotionally complex, even for seasoned veterans. We’re committed to making the play parties we throw high challenge, high support environments. We come together to celebrate and play at our edges. To fully support that endeavor, we provide a dedicated nonsexual space at each party for folks who need to get away from the intensity of the gathering. It means recruiting a team of angels who are available to provide counseling and social support throughout the party. And it means encouraging everyone who attends to commit to being an angel for everyone around them.

H ere's a guide to have a pre-party conversation with your sweetie(s) to make your party go smoothly for both of you: https://bit.ly/beingpartyready

Everyone Contributes: Parties like this are never the work of a single organizer -- it takes the participation and contribution of a host of people. Everyone who attends is expected to co-create the party: money, time, energy, enthusiasm, work, intention, example, concern and/or awareness.

Inclusion: We are dedicated to fostering inclusion in our community. No matter your race, ethnicity, gender identity, or class background, we want everyone who participates in this community to understand that they belong here, and that they have as much of a stake in what happens here as anyone else does. While we recognize that everyone is on a learning curve when it comes to learning how to foster such an atmosphere, we also commit to a stance of learning -- and supporting one another's learning -- of how to be excellent to one another.

This is a dynamic list, ever growing, changing, and deepening as this grand experiment in connection continues. Thanks to you all for playing mad scientist with us.