Weekly Seeds | June 23, 2024 | The Dark Side of Plura

the dark side of Plura

Dark Mode on Plura

 We launched dark mode on Plura last week, which has been our most prominent feature request for the past two years. We’re still tweaking some screens for better color contrast so please send me your feedback as you experience eye-squinting moments.

PS- if you appreciate a heads up on feature releases, please join the Plura chat “what features would you like to see on Plura”.

preview of dark mode

Quiet Quitting of Connections

These past months, my social networks, Signal threads, and Discord servers are filled with painful interactions. Hurtful words are exchanged, requests for care are ignored, and friendships ruptured.

As a result, I'm seeing more and more people bow out of chats in order to take care of their mental health. 

Recently, I've been reflecting on how our tech solutions allow us to “quiet quit” connections with minimal social pain: you can delete the app, leave the group, mute the chat, and hide content from people without their awareness. And with no awareness, there is limited opportunity for learning, and almost no opportunity for repair. 


Joy of Confrontation

If you still believe in the magical power of having crucial conversations and repairing ruptures, you’re invited to our FREE monthly consent workshop on Tuesday: JoCo: the Joy of Confrontation, OR: Making Boundaries Hot (and Repair Intimate) with Pierce Delahunt.

Joy of Confrontation workshop

Asking for help

Speaking of quiet quitting.. I struggle with asking for for what I want.

My 9Y daughter is a pro at pointing out exactly what I need to work on. The other day, I arrived at the dinner table after a very long and busy day of work, packing our house, and parenting kids on summer break. I was stretched to the max and completely overwhelmed. Gaia looked at me and said “Mom. You are doing too much. You need to ask for help. There are other people here that can help you.” And then she took my phone, opened my to-do list and added "ask for help" to it.


Validation. TIL that at least two people in the world struggle with asking for support.

And those two people are: Me, and Billie Eilish. “I would rather suffer in silence than tell you something’s bothering me and have you think I’m sensitive … I come off as a person that doesn’t care. I care about people and I have love and passion, but in relationships, I found myself never ever expressing any of my needs."


Invitation. Help me spread the word about Plura

Plura has mostly grown through word of mouth, with people sharing Plura with their communities, friends, polycules, and weird and awesome humans they meet in the street.

This summer Plura is celebrating 4 years and we couldn’t be more proud of what we’ve built for you and with you. And yet, there are so many people who still don’t know about Plura, and are therefore blocked from discovering community and events (in a world where meta censors many sex positive accounts).

Help us continue growing by inviting your community to Plura. Our new referral program allows you to give friends $5 to buy tickets on Plura. Check out the details in your app by clicking the stars at the top right corner of the For You tab. 


Rainbow | Plura at Leather Alley

If you’re in SF next weekend, don’t forget to check all the activities happening for Pride. Not sure what’s happening? Jump into the SFPride Chat on Plura and get Match before you March!

Also, you can find the Plura team at Leather Alley on Sunday. Come hang out!!


Community Spotlight: Midwest Love Fest

So many conferences and retreats have shut down post 2020, so I’m extra excited when new ones pops up! Southwest Love Fest is branching out to the Midwest with Midwest Love Fest, a new 1-day conference. Check out the three tracks of daytime workshops and evening entertainment fun. August 17th in Indianapolis.

flier for midwest love fest.


See you next week.


Noa Elan

Community Builder | Plura




Note: This newsletter represents my personal opinions and thoughts. I understand I may have unexamined views and I appreciate when people point them out so that I am made aware and can start thinking about them. When I make mistakes I am committed to learning about my impact on others and repairing. 

Contact me anytime: noa@heyplura.com

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