Consent and Safety

How we hold each other accountable to our community standards

You can always reach us at:

Plura perspective on consent and safety is inspired by and written with support from Bonobo Network, SoulPlay, Evolve.Men, and Consent Academy.

Why Plura exists

Plura believes that all people should be able to safely self-identify, self express, and organize. In a world of digital silencing, shadow-banning, and trolling, Plura is committed to creating inclusive and affirming spaces.

We will measure our success by:

1/ how many people find new friends, partners, and communities.

2/ how easy is it for event producers and educators to engage and enroll attendees.

3/ how safe people feel to share their identity and preferences on our platform.

Risk Tolerance and Risk Awareness

We recognize that we live in a world that discriminates against anyone outside of the dominant societal group, on pretty much all identity layers- race, religion, age, disability, sexual orientation, relationship structure and many more.

Trying to self express in a racist, phobic, sex-negative, and patriarchal reality, introduces a risk of encountering bias, discrimination, and judgment from other people. Different people will have different risk profiles and different risk tolerance levels. We invite all members of the Plura to be risk aware and define what level of risk they are willing to expose themselves to.

We seek to mitigate certain risks by holding participants accountable to a common set of values and standards.



We recognize that non-consensual behavior and harm occur in all aspects of life. When it does, we expect that Plura members will be accountable for any harm they may have caused and change their behavior in effort to reduce future harm.

We recognize the challenges associated with punishment and cancel culture, and believe in principles of restorative justice, repair, and reintegration. However, we recognize that we are unable to support accountability and restoration processes at the scale of our platform.

2-pillar approach to making Plura a safe platform

Skill Education

We believe that upfront education is key to reducing harm in the future. We need to teach people the rules of conduct the moment they enter our community. Social norms, language, and expectations are learned quickly when the tools are available and the community is engaged. We are inspired by Burning Man’s community-led onboarding experience.

  • Plura is offering free monthly consent and inclusion workshops to our members. In partnership with Consent Academy, Evolve.Men, and other educators, members will get a chance to deepen their knowledge about how to identify, communicate, and protect their boundaries. And how to hear and respect others NO and apologize in a way that creates repair.
  • Plura has compiled a list of external resources and partners to support members who seek support. The list includes sexual harassment support lines, sex positive organizations, and mental health professionals.

Reporting Policy

You can reach us at:

  • Systems: There are both automated and manual safety systems deployed on Plura. These help detect and remove ill-intent players. (Human) employees review every automated or member report and assess to what extent there is a violation of the community guidelines.

  • Reports by Members are key to keeping the community safe.

    We make it easy for anyone to report a concern, big or small, through direct communication with our team.

    • Members can report any profile, by clicking "..." on the right side of the image, and choosing “Block and Report”. You can also email us:
    • Members can report organizers and events by emailing
    • Note: it is also possible to "unmatch" from someone by tapping the "..." in the top right of a chat conversation. If you do not have an interest in continuing to chat with someone but do not want to report them, you should unmatch them.
  • Read More:

  • Report reviews

    • We evaluate the reports with relationship to our community guidelines. In many cases, it will take two or three reports to remove someone, though the Plura team reserves the right to remove someone after a single report if their continued participation would put the community at risk. The Plura team may not count erroneous reports. For example: If a report was made by mistake or with intent to harm the other person.
  • Feedback, consequences, and removal from Plura. -

    • When possible, Plura will share feedback with members. At minimum, Plura will email members that have had their account suspended.
    • When the Plura team determines that continued participation of the reported person in the community would put the community or its members at risk, the person will have their Plura account suspended and will be unable to log-in to Plura going forward.
    • To protect the privacy of reporters, we will not share details of reports or engage in negotiation on the decision.
    • We recognize the issues associated with punishment and cancel culture, and believe in principles of restorative justice, repair and reintegration. However, we recognize that our account management policies are unable to support accountability and restorative processes at the scale our platform requires. The Plura team always reserves the final right of judgment on our platform.

The work is never done

This document will continue to evolve as our understanding of power-dynamics, oppression, and inclusion advance. The work towards Inclusion and Belonging is an ongoing and multilayered job. We will make mistakes, we will miss things, as is the nature of this work. Our commitment is to continue to show up, repair, learn, and grow - to be humble, brave, and dedicated. You can reach us at



Principles of Harm Reduction

What is Restorative Justice

How I Found a Therapist for My Accountability Process

12 Ways to Say No Gracefully

8 Ways to Hear a No Gracefully

27 Alternatives to asking "Is This OK?"

The Truth about False Accusations

Tips for What You Can do if You’ve Been Accused of a Sexual Violation

Example of an Accountability Plan

The Truth about False Accusations

Appreciations to our team of partners and mentors

This document was created by taking bits and pieces from other policies and the support and feedback of many people.

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